It seems like my life is constantly in a state of stressful flux. I like to say that my coping mechanisms can’t keep up with the new situations in my life, and I have a lot of coping mechanisms.
It’s less about changing fate these days, if fate exists
It’s simply about being who I am
Reminded again of this dichotomy that is me
Agitated again by youth
But you wouldn’t know it by looking at me.
I often wrestle with the more spiritual aspects of reality. It causes me great internal frustration to see my friends and society at large discount spirituality in favor of reductionism.
From a perspective of self-preservation, all actions are justifiable. All actions can contain peace.
If a situation arises in which I feel disloyalty and disrespect, I have no issues enacting whatever consequences necessary in order to free myself of the offense.
The rhythm of my body has become unpredictable. Weeks of no rest, sparse food, sparse sleep, and transitory places have left me in shambles. The dreams I do have feel as if I’m awake, and in those dreams I’m still learning lessons. My mind has no way to relax.